The question every product leader should ask themselves during meetings
The Trade-Off I Never Named Nearly Cost Me Everything
I used to think product leadership meant keeping the train running.
Manage the backlog ✓
Ship features ✓
Keep stakeholders smiling ✓
I was efficient. Productive. Respected.
And I was missing the entire point.
The Moment It All Broke
Six months into leading a major enterprise product, we faced a critical decision point. A cornerstone client—representing 22% of our revenue—was threatening to walk without a permissions feature before their renewal deadline.
My team looked me in the eyes during our planning session:
"We can ship something in two weeks by hardcoding roles and skipping audit logs. But it's a house of cards. The proper solution needs six weeks, minimum."
The tension in the room was suffocating. But instead of naming it, I smiled and said: "Let's find a collaborative path forward!"
Translation: I'm terrified of making this call.
We shipped the shortcut. Closed the renewal. High-fives all around.
Then came the inevitable reckoning.
When three more enterprise clients needed custom permissions, we couldn't adapt our hardcoded system. We spent six excruciating months rebuilding what should have taken six weeks—all while juggling angry stakeholders, demoralized engineers, and my own growing sense that I'd failed everyone.
What I Wish I'd Known
The most powerful words in product aren't "yes" or "no"—they're "this is the trade-off we're facing."
Every time I avoided naming the tension, I wasn't being collaborative. I was being cowardly.
Every time I buried a trade-off discussion, I robbed my team of their chance to shape better outcomes and stole from our customers' future experience.
Now, I carry one essential question into every product conversation:
"Have I said the word 'trade-off' out loud yet?"
If not, I'm probably hiding. From conflict. From alignment. From actual leadership.
Your Turn
What's the last significant trade-off you buried—or courageously named—and how did it transform your team's outcome?
Hit reply. I promise to read every response. Not because I have all the answers, but because I'm still learning how to stand in these moments of tension without flinching.
Sometimes naming what we're all feeling in the room is the most valuable contribution we can make.